You know you are a Salsero/Salsera IF:
1. You vividly remember your first experience with salsa
and the date it happened.
2. You take naps during lunch because you went
dancing last night
3. You never listen to the radio anymore because
all you listen to are salsa cds.
4. You cruise downtown blasting salsa music.
5. You go to a hip hop/dance club and you find
yourself trying to find the beat of the clave.
6. You try your salsa moves in the hip hop/dance
club with somebody that has never partner danced.
7. You dance in your dreams.
8. Salsa lessons/club cover fees are now a
permanent part of your monthly expenses.
9. You say you are going shopping for a new
business outfit, but you are secretly salsa
shopping.
10. Your boyfriend/girlfriend does not
understand the "strictly plutonic" relationship
you have with your salsa partner because you
simply cannot wait until you practice with him/her
again.
11. You watch anything that deals with body
movement, (i.e. karate, gymnastics, figure
skating, ballet) because you are trying to
devise a new salsa move.
12. Everything you do leads back to salsa.
13. You sing songs with words you don't even
understand.
14. You are the only non-latino in the Musica
Latina section.
15. You practice your turns when no one is
looking.
16. You lightly dance your basic when you are
waiting for something or when no one is looking.
17. People do not know you are secretly
practicing your footwork when they are speaking
with you on the phone.
18. You quit watching TV.
19. You convince yourself you can get by on 3-4
hours sleep per night.
20. Would rather have salsa than sex.
21. Salsa IS sex.
22. You have lost about 10 lbs. from dancing so
much.
23. You have searched and found EVERY club in
town.
24. Start spending more on salsa clothes than
work clothes.
25. You've considered getting a different/easier
job day job to co-exist with your salsa dancing.
26. Friday nights are off limits for any events
because you just CANNOT miss your salsa night.
27. You can't buy enough salsa music/clothes/shoes.
28. All your "former" friends have now abandoned
you.
29. You don't even miss your "former" friends,
as long as you have your salsa!
30. You argue about how salsa should be danced.
31. You have met all new (better and more
permanent) friends.
32. Your friends and family do not understand
what you are ranting and raving about.
33. You dump your boyfriend/girlfriend because
he/she is getting in the way of your salsa
training.
34. When you say, "I need my FIX for the week."
you are not referring to drugs.
35. You cannot convince any of your friends to
come with you.
36. You start talking 100 mph just because
someone shows an interest that you like to dance
salsa.
37. You went to a salsa congress and had an
information overload.
38. You use to be humble and shy, but now you
just have to show off every chance you get
39. You go on vacation and instead of looking
forward to seeing the main attraction, you just
cannot wait until you check out the local salsa
clubs.
40. You extend your vacation a few days, just so
you can check out a local club.
41. You watch the MTV music awards and you don't
recognize any of the new groups/singers because
you never listen to that music anymore.
42. You are on the web all day long visiting
salsa web sites.
43. You started working out again because you
have to be in shape to wear those salsa outfits.
44. Your shoes are worn out from spinning so
much.
45. You start clearing space in your room so you
can dance salsa there.
46. You listen to Marc Anthony and start crying.
47. You cannot imagine life without salsa.
48. You start changing your screen names to "Salsa-this"
or "Salsa-that".
49. You are pondering getting a license plate
with "Salsa" somehow in it.
50. You sneak to your car during working hours
just so you can listen to a few salsa tunes 51.
You are a writer/columnist and all you think
about is writing about salsa.
52. You pray at night and thank God for creating
salsa.
53. You install wooden floors in your house
because you prefer them over carpet (Yeah
right!).
54. You get stopped (at work, in a grocery
store, in the mall, etc.) by random people
telling you that they have seen you dance.
55. The only time you rest in the club is during
the merengue breaks.
56. You can only stand merengue for a few songs.
57. You are on that eternal search for those
perfect shoes.
58. Nobody wants to go shopping with you because
all you talk about is how that would look so
good in the salsa club.
59. You are in church listening to the sermon,
but secretly you are dancing in your head.
60. You get desperate to practice and you dance
with an "imaginary" partner.
61. You realize that the only thing you have
done for the past few months is go salsa dancing
every weekend and you feel you still haven't
gotten enough.
62. You realize that the only thing you have
done for the past few years is go salsa dancing
every weekend and you feel you still haven't
gotten enough.
63. For your birthday, you ask for something
related to salsa (i.e. lessons, new shoes, new
outfit).
64. For your birthday, your friends buy you
something related to salsa.
65. You get a few friends together and the first
thing that comes to mind is casino rueda.
66. You are looking for a wedding dress that you
can dance salsa in.
67. You use to have other hobbies.
68. You have chronic knee and back problems from
all the dips, flips, and tricks.
69. You start wearing tight t-shirts.
70. You try to pass your addiction onto your
other friends.
71. You walk into the club and everyone there is
like family to you.
72. You have experienced at least one time when
you overexerted yourself on the dance floor.
73. Your idea of a good first date is to go
salsa dancing.
74. Heaven is having lots of space on the dance
floor.
75. You take something that has no relevance to
salsa dancing, but somehow you manipulate the
conversation to end with salsa.
76. Your skirt keeps getting shorter and shorter.
77. Hell is a place where there is no salsa.
78. Your password is SALSAFREAK.
79. You have engaged in fisticuffs with another
dancer over the "one" and the "two".
80. You decide that going out salsa dancing is
more important than studying for that big exam.
81. You lie to your boss and tell him/her the
reason you have to fly to Los Angles/New
York/Miami or Puerto Rico is strictly for
business.
82. You get caught by your boss surfing the
salsaweb during working hours.
83. You did the "death-drop" move and never came
back up.
84. You leave the club at 3 a.m., completely
tired from dancing all night, and you get
stopped by the cops because you were swerving on
the road. When the cop asks you to perform the
"walk", you start busting out your salsa.
85. You decide the only man/woman you will marry
has to be a salsa dancer.
86. One of your pet peeves are cumbia dancers.
87. Your family coat-of-arms features a couple
salsa dancing.
88. Club owners hate you because you go to the
club and all you do is drink the free water.
89. (Salseras only) You practice day/night with
your partner and when you go to the clubs
together, he goes dancing with all the different
women and you never get asked.
90. You become jealous when watching your dance
partner, whom you have no relations with, dance
with another person.
91. You bust out some salsa solo moves when
waiting in line to use the restroom.
92. You have salsa music on your answering
machine.
93. You sing salsa songs in the shower.
94. You and your friend/partner dance in the
oddest places (i.e. grocery store, mall, gym,
work, etc.).
95. After you break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend,
you go out salsa dancing.
96. Your neighbors are wondering what the hell
that is you are playing.
97. You check you the salsa web's partner search
everyday.
98. You own at least 2-3 salsa instructional
videos.
99. You were already dancing salsa while in you
mother's womb.
100. You do your leg workout earlier in the week
so you can have "fresh" legs for your salsa
weekend.
101. "Wepa!" and "Ahi-namá!" is now part of your
vocabulary.
102. You consider immigrating for salsa.
103. You work in a hospital and you share your
love for salsa with all the doctors, residents
and nurses working with you.
104. You consider getting a team together to
perform Salsa Rueda for the United Way
fundraiser event at the hospital.
105. When you had a bit too much to drink in a
pub, the first thing you ask the stranger
sitting next to you is "Do you dance salsa?"
106. When you tell your friends : " I'm going to
Victoria (or whatever place) this weekend" the
first thing they ask you is " Oh, is there some
salsa event going on there?"
107. When this tells about you:
A man goes to a salsa club and sees a very
pretty lady sitting at a table all by herself.
He finally gets his chance to dance with her,
and when the song is over, he says, "You're such
a great dancer! But I'm kind of surprised to see
you're alone". She says, "Well actually, my
husband and I used go dancing at different clubs
several days a week. Unfortunately, he died and
this is the first time I've gone out without him".
"Wow, that's really sad. But don't you have any
friends or relatives that would want to come
along?", the man asks. "I suppose", she replies,
"but they're all at the funeral".
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